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Q&A: Scared of boyfriends dogs?

Question by Maci<3: Scared of boyfriends dogs?

Sorry for the re-post, I just wanted some more answers

My boyfriend has two German Shepard’s who I am very afraid of. The only reason I am scared of his dogs is because they constantly bark, jump and scratch at me. I am not typically afraid of dogs, but I am always very uncomfortable as soon as I walk in the door because that is when they get all hyped up. Every time i walk into the room they are in, they will jump and scratch as well. I have a Yellow Lab, so they are about the same size as my dog, but mine NEVER jumps and scratches. I really like my boyfriend and don’t want to break up with him over his dogs, but they really scare me. We are both 15, and i don’t want to sound rude to his parents considering my dog is the exact size (probably larger) but just way more well behaved. I have told my boyfriend that they scare me but all he does is just try to get them off of me, and by that time i am already scratched up. I am very tiny at only 5 foot tall so they probably look at me as a large toy. His parents get mad if we lock them in a room so we cant do that. Any suggestions?
30 minutes ago – 4 days left to answer.
Additional Details
I don’t feel that it is my place to be attempting to “train” his dogs since they aren’t mine. I really do enjoy going over to his house, because he just has a fun house to be at in general. And we cant be locked in a room together (were both 15, our parents don’t allow it..yeah you get the picture lol)
18 minutes ago

@Suki – exactly! i don’t want to tell his parents how to train the dogs. Plus i they were rescues and they didn’t get the dogs as puppies to train them. His parents just yell at the dogs, thinking it will do something. I don’t want the dogs to get hurt, but cant they just grab their collar and at least pull them down?
15 minutes ago

I have told my boyfriend they scare me, and he really does nothing about it. His mom already doesn’t like me (apparently my shorts are too short and i talk about inappropriate things) so I don’t want to give her another reason to not like me. In all honesty, he has an odd family. They cant exactly see the obvious, such as how I am uncomfortable when the dogs jump on me.
9 minutes ago
@Foon – No, they arent calm at all when they see the dogs on me. They yell at them, which I think has an even more negative effect.
@Foon – When his parents walk in, they seriously ignore them. The dogs are just generally wild. It is a male and female, i dont know if that has anything to do with it as well.

Best answer:

Answer by Stephania
That really sucks. I mean what CAN you do? You can’t lock them up nor train them and apparently the parents are snotty and don’t like you. All i can think of is trying to calm the dogs down when you’re there; Like, maybe giving them treats when they sit or just really getting them calm. Try petting them or gentle playing. Have the learn that you’re good, but not a chew toy. get them to respect you.

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  • If your boyfriend does nothing even after you express to him that you’re scared of his dogs, then he does not care about you. Not truly. If he cared about you, he would make sure you are safe and that you FEEL safe at all times.

  • Does your boyfriend and their family make a big deal when they come in jumping around and reciprocating the “Oh my gosh they’re home!!” kind of feeling that the dogs have? When they walk in have they tried acting nonchalant and even ignoring the dogs until they calm down and then give them attention? I think dogs can tell when someone is uncomfortable. I think it shows a lack of respect that they won’t put the dogs in a nother room or at least keep them out of one room that everyone is in.

    ADD: Yelling might be adding to the excitement.. Do they walk in excited to see the dogs or playing with the dogs before they start jumping?

  • Since your position is unique in that they are not your dogs to train you need to work a different angle. Start becoming noticeably upset when the dogs jump and hurt you. You could even pretend to cry after they scratch you up. Tell your boyfriend and his parents that your parents are upset that their dogs keep hurting you and they may stop letting you come over. Scare your boyfriend a bit and he will deal with his parents. the way to them is through him. Good luck!

  • if your scared then tell him the truth it’s ok he should understand

  • breakeup with him thats the only way things will changed

  • As the owner of a German Shepherd, I can tell you they need strong leadership. Obviously, they do not get it, and so they run the household, thinking (rightly) that they can do whatever they want to anyone who enters “their” house. You being afraid of them just makes them even MORE likely to bully you. You have two choices. You can stop going to his house, or YOU can stop the dogs from jumping on you. When the dog jumps up, you bend your knee and bring it up. You are not kicking the dog, you are blocking it’s jump by bumping it in the chest with your knee. A few “bumps” and the dog should get the idea. If anyone objects, tell them you have to do SOMETHING to keep the dogs off you since they can’t. I can’t imagine letting MY dog act that way to a guest. She was an adult rescue too, that’s NO excuse for allowing that kind of behavior. They are either really horrible dog owners, or they dislike you to the point they WANT their dogs to hurt you. I would think twice about staying connected to such a family.

  • I have never come across a german shepard which acts that way. All the ones I have come across in peoples homes have been very well behaved and gentle. I think it is your boyfriends parents responsibility to train and control their dogs, as a guest you should not have to feel intimidated by them and they especially need to do something about it if they are hurting you. Personally I think they are being irresponsible.

    Whether his mum likes you or not, she needs to do something about them and get them to calm down around guests. If she is not doing anything about them because she doesn’t like you then not only does that make her an irresponsible owner but also a very bitter and nasty woman. People should NEVER encourage or allow intimidating or harmful behaviour from their dogs as it is not only dangerous but will make the behaviour even harder to correct if a dog thinks it is ok by their owner. Many dogs live to please their owners.

    Do your boyfriends dogs listen to him? Couldn’t he attempt to train them to be better behaved around guests? *Some* dogs only really listen to what they consider their primary owner and will only really listen to who they see as the authoritarian. My dog for instance wouldn’t really listen much to me because he considered me lower down in the “pack” as we got him when I was much younger but luckily he was very friendly and a big sofite to everybody especially guests.

    I would be mortified if I had a dog which was doing that and harming my guests. In my own experiences some dogs have jumped up at me but were not intimidating and would get down if I asked them to.

    You need to say to your boyfriend seriously that it is a huge problem for you and you have a right to not be intimidated. Your boyfriend needs to either train the dogs himself or get his parents to. If they refuse to do this then they are not responsible dog owners and in many cases it is irresponsible dog owners which cause accidents.

    I think you could try ignoring them, don’t make a fuss of them (negative or positive) at all until they have calmed down and maybe they will get the message that the way they will get attention from you is by being calm and that intimidating behaviour is not accepted by you. I would maybe try this and also have a serious talk with your boyfriend. Changing a dogs pattern of behaviour can take a lot of work and time but it needs to be done.

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